Monday, 7 March 2016

And The Wind Whispers Peace


 

 


 








It is easy in modern life to get over-whelmed. Before you know it, and without much appearing to have happened in the way of conscious thought or decision making, you find yourself juggling many things, spinning far too many plates not to drop one.

I tend not to notice the subtle signs that rest is needed. I am a Power On Through type of girl, impatient with mortal frailties. A Coper. The end result is that, sometimes, I can topple over into exhaustion. 
This is OK (ish) when you have no other responsibilities than yourself and a week or two off can be spent sleeping/ watching TV/ going for walks/ reading/ getting up late, and at the end of it back up you pop, all restored, refreshed, recharged and raring to go. 

It is less straightforward when you're a busy wife and mother and have other people depending on you. Then, that kind of rest necessitates other people shifting the smooth flow of their lives around to accommodate you, which, however kindly they do this, doesn't seem very fair on them.

Anyway, over the past couple of weeks I have revisited the lesson that has been raised more than once in the past twelve months, a lesson I thought I was adhering to but apparently not enough, that rest is an important element of capacity and that limits are there to be honoured and respected. I had little choice in the matter as it turned out, which perhaps was just as well. I've got it now, the lesson. I am reorganising life. I have stopped my degree and I am returning to previously well-trodden paths that enable activity minus the stretched-out thin exhaustion brought on by juggling too many things at once. I find that I am starting to see things clearly again, breathing calmly in and out now that the mist is clearing. 

I was directed a while ago to a book about England's ancient roads, and when I started reading it I wondered why I found myself writing down a quote from it on the inside of the front cover: 

"There is nothing like a walk for making you accept an obvious solution, no matter how challenging it might be."

The words rolled about my head and echoed and I kept returning to stare at the quote, trying to figure why it, more than anything else, kept connecting. Eventually I worked out what it was telling me and what I needed to do.

So, a reorganisation. Time to breath and think and quietly formulate gentle plans and simple directions. Already I feel better; already I can see the path ahead; an uncomplicated path, a simple, rustic, wooden and unfussy path that was there all along, running quietly through woods and trees, fields and rivers, with the wind whispering peace beside it. 

How about you? 

CT :o)



51 comments:

  1. Hey CT,
    Have you stopped your degree in its' entirety, or just taking a break? That said, I can wholeheartedly identify with the going at it like a bull at a gate scenario. Us doers and copers are usually terrible at self care. For lots of reasons. And although I have missed your posts, I can quite understand the need to stop and feel the breath. It's something I had to do several years ago. And yes it does feel unfair on others, but it's all about reciprocity and doing to others as you would do to yourself stuff. I'm glad that you have recognized the need to go more gentle. You are a rather wonderful woman. And yes, walking. I'm all for it.
    Leanne xxxxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Modern life is hectic isn't it? So many different demands on time and pressure on time to stretch and for everything to fit in to it. Finding the balance is elusive xx

      Delete
  2. What a great post, I think I am on the right path now xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh CT, What a resonate post! Sometimes it is so necessary just to call Stop! to all the hetic busyness that complicate our lives. I hope you are content with your decision, and you achieve what is right for you. Those long unfussy walks will be very restorative. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was as good as taken out of my hands in the sense that I really wasn't feeling I had space in my head for it anymore. I think I had probably gone as far as I was meant to. My energies need to be focused elsewhere now. Hope all's well with you my dear? Long time no hear xx

      Delete
    2. Thanks CT, all is well apart from being exhausted. ;) So I know how you feel. I have just 10 or so weeks left to push on through and then I am also taking a break, paring back down to the simples. I have been thinking of you all morning and just wanted to say, how bravely honest you are!

      Delete
    3. Ah bless you Shauna. I'm sorry you're knackered too and pleased you're taking a break in a few weeks. I don't know about you, but I forget I'm not 20 anymore! Hope the kids are well xx

      Delete
  4. I know exactly what you mean. I appreciate your advice and I hope you're doing okay. It sounds like you've been under a lot of stress. I understand completely. I have been feeling very overwhelmed with a few things since the start of the year and I'm finally starting to get a grip on it all in the past week or two; hopefully I have nowhere to go but up from here!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The hardest thing was acknowledging that even the things you love can cause exhaustion and contribute to pressure. It was a new element of understanding for me. I hope you are OK, Jennifer. I know how hard you work to look after those little bears of yours, and the big bear too. I'm glad to hear you' feel you're sorting through and heading upwards. Xx

      Delete
  5. I hope you are feeling on a more even keel now, CT. I'm sure we could have a long conversation about getting on with things, ploughing on, juggling, etc. Being a mother and wife/partner, while working and trying to fit in time to pursue your own interests is tricky and riven with compromises. It is not possible to Do It All. Take care of yourself and take plenty of long walks with those adorable dogs. Sam xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Sam. I think we could probably talk for ages over cake about all of this ;-). You are so right about it not being possible to maintain doing everything. Something had to give and as i'd rather it wasn't me the degree was the obvious thing. I am feeling better- looking forward to summer :-) xx

      Delete
  6. This post is full of so much wisdom. I am a doer and a coper, but am now suffering from some of the downside to that kind of personality. I have somehow lost the resilience I used to have, and had I been wiser when I was at your stage of life and slowed down on my journey I don't think I would be in the state I am now. Good for you for making the changes that are needed, even if one of those changes means stopping work on your degree. A degree doesn't mean much if we don't have our health and peace of mind along with it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do sympathise, Kristie, feeling low in resilience is horrible when you're used to being a capable person. Do you practice any breathing techniques? I find them very helpful for calming things down and also helping the energy to flow more smoothly through the system. It's very simple, soothing and effective. Sending you all best wishes x

      Delete
    2. You sound very much like me. I like to keep my timetable full and enjoy life to the full - but sometimes one has to take a step back and let the world keep spinning without you.

      Delete
    3. I like the simplicity of that, Weave, the world spinning while you take a step back. X

      Delete
  7. I hope you are now feeling more relaxed and recovering from your exhaustion. Why do we leave it so late to recognise the signs that we are over-stretching ourselves so that the impact hits us so hard. Take care. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's the downside to being a positive optimist- we don't like to admit we've reached our limit xx

      Delete
  8. Glad you are feeling more like you again, just in time for Spring.x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A perfect time of year to declutter, CK ;-) xx

      Delete
  9. This resonated with me too. We can't do it all. I'm still trying to rebalance things in my mind and I am feeling lots better but it is so hard not to let negative emotions take over. Like you I get most pleasure from the simple things in life: growing, cooking, walking, making. Why did I think that owning a second home would add anything to my life I have no idea. Take care CT.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully it helps you as it does me to know you're not alone in going through a rough patch. I firmly believe these experiences are here to teach us and we can be better for them once we understand the message. Hope you're OK xx

      Delete
  10. I admire your decision, a hard one to make!
    Look forward and enjoy!
    Best wishes to you xxxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're a wise woman and a good pal, Sal xx

      Delete
  11. When I read this earlier I cried so I didn't comment then. I do so hope that all will be well for you and most importantly of all that you will be healthy and happy! You know yourself best of all and what is right for you and it is good that you are listening to that. It is good to take time and consider things. I hope you know that my hugs and love are always with you - I don't just come here for the doggies you know! - and there was a lot of love in that shawl, so wrap it around you and feel my arms around you giving you a hug! Thinking of you and always here if ever you need. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sorry I made you cry, lovely Amy. You made me a tad weepy with your lovely words. I shall put the shawl round my shoulders and smile, thank you my friend. T and P send you their love too xxx

      Delete
  12. Onwards & upwards & all that. I firmly believe that until we admit to ourselves that we actually can't do it all well that is when true peace lands upon your soul. I hope the winds keep on whispering to you. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree - no matter how hard it is to stop something you love, if it isn't working for you it has to go. Onwards and upwards. Hope all's well my dear xx

      Delete
  13. Busy house and garden you have there! I've enjoyed being outside today, my health takes a dive if I don't get out there as much as I can.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm the same, Si- I rely on nature for so much.

      Delete
  14. Sounds like you've made a very sensible decision. I think many women tend to just battle through, but being a wife and mother also means that you have to take care of yourself in order that you can care for everyone else. Love the last photo of your gorgeous doggies and your bird photos always amaze me - mine are usually just a blurry mess. Have a restful week. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's a message I've heard this week, about looking after yourself so you can look after everyone who needs you. It's such a good point but easy to overlook at times. I giggled about the bird pics- I have a good camera that does all the hard work and the feeders are right next to the window ;-) xx

      Delete
  15. How beautifully you have written about your uncomplicated path through the trees. I'm so very glad you're feeling better now. Letting go of things can be hard sometimes, but when it's done it's often such a relief we wonder why we held on. Enjoy the path and the peaceful wind. It's going to be a good summer I think. Hugs, CJ xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've chosen a good time of year for a spring clean, eh? Imagine if winter were creeping towards us, that would be rather gloomy. As it is sunshine, flowers and butterflies- what's not to look forward to? :-) xx

      Delete
  16. So pleased you are feeling better with your self,some times it's hard to let go, and there is nothing stopping you taking things back on when you are ready.
    Lovely to see your photos again..
    Amanda xx

    ReplyDelete
  17. "So, a reorganisation. Time to breath and think and quietly formulate gentle plans and simple directions. Already I feel better; already I can see the path ahead; an uncomplicated path, a simple, rustic, wooden and unfussy path that was there all along, running quietly through woods and trees, fields and rivers, with the wind whispering peace beside it. "
    What an inspiring post CT, you have a way of putting things that bring a chink of light into my sometimes troubled mind.......thank you my dear friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad it helped, John. Light is always welcome x

      Delete
  18. You've been in my thoughts...

    Yes, to all you've said. Not surprisingly, we're twinning again. Slow, simple, unfussy...sounds about right. :) xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. One thing I am looking forward to with a less cluttered and stretched mind is being able to email friends properly. I will be therefore in touch. Hope you're ok, chick? Xx

      Delete
    2. I'm grand, just grand. :) Taking steps to look after my battered old bod has occupied my time of late, but it's all Very Good Now...looking forward to hearing from you. [all in good time of course] xoxo

      Delete
  19. I hope all is well now, CT. As has already been said, it's spring soon and I hope long, country walks in the first warm sunshine will help bring some peace xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so looking forward to green leaves, warm air, insects and summer visitors, not to mention working in the garden. Perfect medicine x

      Delete
  20. So sorry to read of the tough time you have been going through but pleased to hear you are now feeling better after making some tough decisions.

    Letting go can be hard at times but sometimes we have no choice.

    Take care CT

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't like admitting it, but I'm not as young as I was and my energy doesn't stretch quite as far as it did twenty years ago! Lesson learned:-). Just off to catch up with your new bird xx

      Delete
  21. Bbbbbbbeautiful photos, especially the last.

    ReplyDelete
  22. You always sound so busy doing so many things. It must have been difficult to give up your degree. I hope you will find the new path leads you to a more calming space. Sarah x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It took me a while to realise I needed to stop, but I am excited about the future and have some thoughts/ possibilities tucked up my sleeve which I shall share as and when. Hope all's well with you xx

      Delete
  23. Your new paths have started. Best of luck. You said it all in that line from the book and I love that last paragraph. Sometimes we put too much on our plates and we stop smelling the roses. Always take time to smell the roses....my Mum would always say. Have a wonderful day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's good advice and something I plan to do from now on in x

      Delete

Thank you for leaving a comment. I always enjoy reading them and will try my best to reply to every one. CT x