Thursday, 1 January 2015

Why Exercise Is Bad For You, and Sewing Projects Begin In Earnest

For the last two days I have been walking around like someone suffering from acute and permanent incontinence (if you can have both at the same time)

Contrary to popular belief, this is no laughing matter. 

Returning from an early morning -5 degree run round the icy fields with M t'other day, we proceeded to indulge in the kind of muscle-strengthening exercises that would do the Ministry Of Funny Walks proud.
This was the cause of a good deal of merriment for our neighbours, who were treated to such random expressions as my goodness, you don't have to bend far before you can really feel it, do you? and how low down are you so supposed to go, exactly? and how many times do you need to do it before it makes a difference?

After five minutes of this, ill-disguised audible snorts of laughter were coming from behind the fence.

What were we doing? I hear you cry in intrigued voices. 

Lungeing.

Which is a deceptively easy-looking exercise (so don't let that fool you) that involves walking in large bending-the-knee-low-to-the-ground type steps up and down the garden. The knee of the back leg (so to speak) touches the ground. You obviously then swap round so the other knee touches the ground on the next step. It doesn't exactly hurt but you can feel it working. It's  meant to strengthen the glute muscles that power runners up hills.

After only ten or so steps we had finished, and I said to M, well, that wasn't too bad, I reckon I could easily do that every day, and I went indoors for a shower wondering at the wry grin on his face.

I knew exactly what the grin meant when I woke next morning and couldn't move.

Every single muscle fibre in my bottom was on fire.

I couldn't get out bed and had to lever myself up using M as a staging post and then I discovered I couldn't walk. I tried to sit down again and couldn't do that either because it was too painful. In the end (with my husband crying with laughter and threatening to video me and put it on the blog) I managed to waddle over to my clothes and somehow got dressed, with much sharp in-drawing of breaths, then eased myself gingerly and with much oohing and ahhing down the stairs, one at a time. It was only when I got to the bottom that I remembered I was driving Ma into Winchester that morning so we could go fabric shopping together.

I somehow got into the car and drove over to her house, then realised everything had seized up again during the drive so I couldn't get out without hanging onto the door. She of course took one look at my waddling, I've-Been-On-Board-Ship-For-Far-Too-Long, sailor's rolling gait and also couldn't stop laughing. Needless to say the entire shopping trip was punctuated with lots of jokes about walking sticks and old ladies, which got worse when I had to take the lift up to the second floor of C&H Fabrics and then virtually slid down the banisters at Cath Kidston's because I couldn't face walking down the stairs.

It wasn't any better by the evening. I made a cake, and had to sit on the floor of the kitchen in order to get it out of the oven because bending down was impossible. Poppy found this most intriguing and sat staring at me with her head cocked to one side trying to work out whether it was a game or not. I actually forgot the cake was in the oven and so, to save it from burning, leapt up off the sofa when I remembered and took half a running step before I was reminded (by way of excruciating muscle pain) that I couldn't walk let alone run, and so ended up doing this bizarre and (judging from M's renewed paroxysms of laughter) comic hopping waddle instead. L came in in the middle of this, took one look at me, raised an eyebrow and delivered the immortal line: I keep telling you exercise is bad for you, before walking off chuckling.

Today it is slightly better, although I am still walking like someone with a poo in their pants and having to lever myself into and out of chairs.

By way of recompense I got some lovely fabrics, ribbons, lace and buttons in Winchester and also treated myself to a couple of sewing project books, which, as I am a beginner, will hopefully prove useful. They are giving me some good ideas on what to make, but I would very much like any suggestions you expert crafters and sewers out there have? I need a pin cushion so that will probably by my first project (hopefully nice and simple) and I'm wondering about making a patchwork quilt. (Amy I remember that fantastic one you made from old shirt material last summer, so if you have any tips for a beginner I'd really appreciate them. I'll try and find the post you wrote too).

Here are some pics of my purchases. (Note the G&T in the bottom right of the first pic, an essential component of any sewing project). I have had the little round sewing basket since I was a girl :o)













Anyhoo, will keep you posted on the outcome of my sewing adventures and hope by the time I blog again to have a normal working bum!

Hope all are well,

CT x

40 comments:

  1. You articulated your pain so well, I couldn't help but laugh! Hope you are soon recovered!

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    1. We've been giggling about it for the last two days here :o) It is feeling much easier tonight so hopefully I can get back to running tomorrow x

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  2. Oh, cute little things. I always wonder why I love to look at creative things like these but couldn't make one. :P

    These are really beautiful gifts. Well, I hope you have an even more beautiful 2015!

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  3. Had to laugh at your description - sorry. Hope it heals soon, perhaps not quite so many lunges all at once next time. There will be a next time?

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    1. I have been the 'butt' of all jokes here the past two days but it is starting to ease off now, thank you :o)

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  4. Oh Dear!! Your explanation of your exercise events and afterwards your pain made me laugh. Perhaps you should read your title for this post and obey it. Too much of a good thing and all that!!! I suggest you stick to sewing, surely it would not cost you so much trouble. HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU.

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    1. You wait till the sewing-related injuries begin, Margaret! Happy New Year to you too x

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  5. Oh no!! Somehow I feel wildly responsible, but seeing as now I never run a step, I can't be - it is the shopping that has made me feel responsible! Your crafting/sewing supplies are all incredibly yummy and I am very excited for you. I still have to finish the quilt that you mentioned - better add that to my planning list for the year! I did order a wool winder today! I hope that you are much recovered again very soon and can walk again before you return to college and that the sewing goes well, a pincushion is a great place to start I think! I hope you have a great new year and that the running and crafting and wildlifing and everything else goes really well for you! xx

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    1. I've just discovered there is a quilting shop in Romsey, so now I have no excuse not to embark on this project :o) Walking much easier tonight so hopefully back to running tomorrow. Very excited for you re the wool winder and looking forward to seeing it on your blog in due course :o) xx

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  6. Funny story! I've felt like that many times after starting an exercise routine. I'm now your newest follower. :)

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    1. Hey Linda :o) Thank you for the comment and the follow- I have reciprocated :o)

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  7. I'm with L: too much excercise is not a good idea! I say, stick to walking and you won't go wrong. Good luck if you start running again tomorrow... (how is Poppy's harness working out, by the way?)
    The sewing things look lovely and I hope you make something that you will show us soon... Lily xxx

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    1. He's absolutely thrilled to have a bona fide reason NOT to do any exercise whatsoever now, Lily :o) Pop's harness is fab- thanks so much for the nudge to get one. If you have time, have a look at my last post of 2014 as there's a pic of Pop in it on it and you and Flossy get a mention :o) Hope all's well xx

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  8. Poor thing, at least you provided merriment for your family. Hope it's better.--hart

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    1. Silver linings :o) Feeling much better this evening Hart, thank you :o)

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  9. I'm laughing, I'm sorry I can't help it. I do hope you've learned from this. No more nasty exercise. Stick to the G&T and sewing. It will be days before you're back to normal. In the meantime stay close to home and take it easy. CJ xx

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    1. Perhaps I should try G&T before exercise, then I'd be so relaxed the muscles wouldn't feel a thing :o) xx

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  10. Hey CT,
    I have that book! It's pristine! Apparently open air lunges can damage your health.....
    Leanne xx

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    1. I'll try them indoors from now on :o) Moving today without squeaking, which is a huge improvement xx

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  11. Oh dear me, poor you but you are so funny! What are lunges for?? I was quite inspired by your post about getting new running shoes but after that post I think some more Wine and chocolate from the safety of the sofa..:)

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    1. Funnily enough, all the running has been absolutely fine, even the upped mileage didn't result in aches and pains, only the sodding garden exercises, so don't be put off. On the other hand, wine and chocolate does sound enticing.... :o) xx

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  12. Oh excellent. Leave the exercise until the spring. T'ain't natural to do physical jerks in winter.....

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    1. Bum restored today Stephanie so I'll be trotting up and down the lane again. M says I should do 3-4 lunges to stretch the muscles out now- yikes! xx

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  13. Oh how I sympathise. I've over done it occasionally, albeit with the best of intentions. Going down stairs is the hardest, ouch. I think it probably was the knee to the floor element that did for you. Not quite as deep and everything will be ticketyboo. Full of praise though for your frosty morning efforts.

    Jean
    x

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    1. Many thanks, Jean. I'm sure the benefits will outweigh the angst, and at the very least it provided an enormous amount of humour for everyone here for a day or two! xx

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  14. Ouch!! Glad to hear you feel better today! The sewing items look interesting - I'll be interested to see what you make although I think I will stick to knitting :) Sewing machines/needles and I don't get on!

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    1. Just back from the shops and supplied with everything I could possibly need to make a quilt. What it will end up looking like is anyone's guess! :o)

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  15. Glad to read your kept your sense of humour CT. Exercise is so important and makes us happy.

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    1. It does for sure. I've more or less recovered now and am back to running (although haven't done any lungeing since!).

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  16. I feel your pain CT but have to admit to snorting with laughter too. Happy new year to all of you. XXX

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    1. And to you all, Em. Causing merriment seems to be my role in life at the moment. I suppose it could be worse.... :o) xx

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  17. The last time I had so much pain I couldn't walk OR move my arms was the day after we'd bought the kids Wii games console with the sports package. The lunges came from the ten pin bowling and the arm workout was the tennis!! Neither of us could move for three days!!! I feel your pain x

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    1. I'm afraid I giggled at your Wii-related injuries. Superb! xx

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  18. Sorry, but just had to giggle at your pain :) You've convinced me it's safer for me to stay on my sofa! Great buys on your shopping trip x

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    1. I can see I'm going to have to do a more positive exercise post to re-convince everyone of the benefits of running :o) Thanks for the hand warmer tip pre-xmas btw- I made a load up here and they all went down well (they were the perfect excuse to buy a new sewing machine too!). x

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  19. Oooh - I feel your pain. Been there. I've almost given up completely on exercise outside of walking and push-ups.

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    1. Thanks, Casey. It's pretty much gone today and I'm back to running (although haven't attempted any more lunges yet!) :o)

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  20. The first time I did lunges at keep fit I could hardly walk...they feel so easy don't they. Anyway, I didn't get the same problem after I had done them a couple of times. Great sewing projects, I hope you get to make some lovely things.

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    1. M assures me it'll be fine when I do it again, so I shall try some more lunges this week and hope not to be waddling again afterwards! :o)

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Thank you for leaving a comment. I always enjoy reading them and will try my best to reply to every one. CT x